Always Use Protection
Porn Hub dot com. I was blindsided by the images I found searching my web browser history. We had not used protection! The graphic nature of the moving ads alone burned my retinas with disproportionate images that hardly made physical sense.
Logging into my computer I found the first clue. A computer hastily closed raised my suspicion. My intuition to search its web browser was a virtual a gold mine.
December 28th, for an entire six minutes someone watched 'Dirty Little Stepsister'.
Who knew 'Walking the Dog' was as perverse as Spanking the Monkey or Choking the Chicken?
On November 8th, I found an explicit title that made my jaw hit the floor. The history in between deleted, thanks to my stealthy Christmas shopping savvy, always erasing my purchases for snooping teens, along with my red-hot trail of evidence. How much porn had been digested by virgin eyes?
Sick to my stomach, I screamed for my husband upstairs. I knew it wasn't him. A computer expert would never be so reckless! I was burning hot. We were alone for a few hours and I was aroused, furious we had never used protection. Always use protection right? As in a firewall, to block porn from our house! How had we been so careless?
Long gone are the days when porn magazines were the most accessible X-rated pleasure. Apparently there's a hub for porn and I'm a prude. XXX, teen, gay, lesbian, porn stars, whatever your fancy...but not in my kids' house! I was 99% sure whose innocence was stolen on my computer, fingertips away from an all-night porn fest. Meanwhile, I'm preaching respect, moral values and equality for all in the #MeToo generation.
"All boys know about Porn Hub dot com," said my husband, trying to rationalize, "they talk about it on the playground. Porn is about 1/3 of all Internet traffic!" Hardly a Catholic nun, how was I unaware?
My kids have learned pornography is an addiction in high school. I was desperate to save my son from warped views of sexual relationships at such a ripe age of innocence. Ahhh... the joys of parenting: zero warning, zero training, zero appreciation, and awake at zero dark thirty worrying about my children!
The CIA interrogation was fast and easy, like a porn hub tag line. My son squirmed on the couch refusing to divulge any breach of trust to his mom and dad. "You always get in less trouble when you tell the truth," I reminded him, noticing the sweat on his brow. I gambled, my sixth sense aware of his guilt.
"It's perfectly normal to be curious," I faced him with the consequence of a mother/son sex conversation, sure to make any pubescent teen squirm. "Porn hub dot com is not reality. It's a skewed view of sex." I continued, his father speechless.
"Can I go now?" he begged, refusing to make eye contact. "Dude, you're not in trouble, just know that we trust you until you give us a reason not to and then we take measures to ensure your safety."
Short of using the lie-detector interrogation while holding his sweaty palms, a tried and true spy-mom technique, I deduced all teenage boys knew about Porn Hub and was relieved he didn't show his 9-year-old brother or friends. I've never felt more naive as a parent who believed screen time limits were my biggest worry.
The next day I frantically set content restrictions on each of my sons' devices and found Googling Internet security protection required a PhD. I was on fire and sweating the situation, a woman in distress, in desperate need of a hands-on hi-tech geek. My sexy software engineer husband sprang into action anticipating greatness. It was not quick and dirty, and certainly not a five minute ordeal. We tested many sexually explicit phrases. Circumventing devices with parental controls proved difficult.
Ultimately we chose OpenDNS, a free service that safely blocks sexually explicit websites at the router. Our intent is not to censor our children's every move or suppress natural curiosity in our household democracy. Even the most stringent family safety apps are not immune to kids outwitting parental controls.
We are parenting in reactionary mode daily as we learn the ropes keeping up with technology, dating, social media, and gaming, not to mention college research in the digital age. As parents we plan to lock our door and encourage our 'bored' kids to walk the dog!
You can assume your connection is no longer private in our home, thanks to my handy tech geek. Sorry Porn Hub dot com, we require consent and always use protection! Do you?
Logging into my computer I found the first clue. A computer hastily closed raised my suspicion. My intuition to search its web browser was a virtual a gold mine.
December 28th, for an entire six minutes someone watched 'Dirty Little Stepsister'.
Who knew 'Walking the Dog' was as perverse as Spanking the Monkey or Choking the Chicken?
On November 8th, I found an explicit title that made my jaw hit the floor. The history in between deleted, thanks to my stealthy Christmas shopping savvy, always erasing my purchases for snooping teens, along with my red-hot trail of evidence. How much porn had been digested by virgin eyes?
Sick to my stomach, I screamed for my husband upstairs. I knew it wasn't him. A computer expert would never be so reckless! I was burning hot. We were alone for a few hours and I was aroused, furious we had never used protection. Always use protection right? As in a firewall, to block porn from our house! How had we been so careless?
Long gone are the days when porn magazines were the most accessible X-rated pleasure. Apparently there's a hub for porn and I'm a prude. XXX, teen, gay, lesbian, porn stars, whatever your fancy...but not in my kids' house! I was 99% sure whose innocence was stolen on my computer, fingertips away from an all-night porn fest. Meanwhile, I'm preaching respect, moral values and equality for all in the #MeToo generation.
"All boys know about Porn Hub dot com," said my husband, trying to rationalize, "they talk about it on the playground. Porn is about 1/3 of all Internet traffic!" Hardly a Catholic nun, how was I unaware?
My kids have learned pornography is an addiction in high school. I was desperate to save my son from warped views of sexual relationships at such a ripe age of innocence. Ahhh... the joys of parenting: zero warning, zero training, zero appreciation, and awake at zero dark thirty worrying about my children!
The CIA interrogation was fast and easy, like a porn hub tag line. My son squirmed on the couch refusing to divulge any breach of trust to his mom and dad. "You always get in less trouble when you tell the truth," I reminded him, noticing the sweat on his brow. I gambled, my sixth sense aware of his guilt.
"It's perfectly normal to be curious," I faced him with the consequence of a mother/son sex conversation, sure to make any pubescent teen squirm. "Porn hub dot com is not reality. It's a skewed view of sex." I continued, his father speechless.
"Can I go now?" he begged, refusing to make eye contact. "Dude, you're not in trouble, just know that we trust you until you give us a reason not to and then we take measures to ensure your safety."
Short of using the lie-detector interrogation while holding his sweaty palms, a tried and true spy-mom technique, I deduced all teenage boys knew about Porn Hub and was relieved he didn't show his 9-year-old brother or friends. I've never felt more naive as a parent who believed screen time limits were my biggest worry.
The next day I frantically set content restrictions on each of my sons' devices and found Googling Internet security protection required a PhD. I was on fire and sweating the situation, a woman in distress, in desperate need of a hands-on hi-tech geek. My sexy software engineer husband sprang into action anticipating greatness. It was not quick and dirty, and certainly not a five minute ordeal. We tested many sexually explicit phrases. Circumventing devices with parental controls proved difficult.
Ultimately we chose OpenDNS, a free service that safely blocks sexually explicit websites at the router. Our intent is not to censor our children's every move or suppress natural curiosity in our household democracy. Even the most stringent family safety apps are not immune to kids outwitting parental controls.
We are parenting in reactionary mode daily as we learn the ropes keeping up with technology, dating, social media, and gaming, not to mention college research in the digital age. As parents we plan to lock our door and encourage our 'bored' kids to walk the dog!
You can assume your connection is no longer private in our home, thanks to my handy tech geek. Sorry Porn Hub dot com, we require consent and always use protection! Do you?
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