Adventures In Motherhood

The pooch ate our breakfast. With dwindling supplies, the muffins I made yesterday would've sustained us another morning until we restocked our wagon. The bitch is a thief and you think we'd have learned by now not to store food on the gas stove next to the pleather couch when the natives are restless! During our month-long RV trip, Mayzie, the middle-aged black Schnoodle with the gap-tooth smile, has consumed a half-loaf of bread, two dozen of grandma's chocolate chip cookies, my son's Doritos Locos taco from Taco Bell and a dozen cinnamon sugar sweet Raisin Bran muffins, wrappers and all. I can picture our two-year-old, eight-pound Schnoodle Ozzie watching her peruse the veritable buffet from below, lacking the fortitude to jump that high. I'm sure Mayzie didn't allow a scrap to fall as there's only one Schnoodle who needed the outdoor shower to shamingly hose off her hindquarters. Did she learn her lesson? No! So much for doggie FOMO (fear of missing ow